Really need a Glowforge status dashboard

Transparency is important. There are plenty of easy ways to provide this. https://www.statuspage.io/ is quite good, very cheap, and very popular. It’s used by Dropbox, Twilio, New Relic, Reddit, Fastly, Vimeo, … you get the idea. Not only does it make uptime visible (which speeds troubleshooting and earns credibility), it can send out customer alerts, coordinate planned outages (for upgrades, etc.) and feed outages into internal ops tools.

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